Being Single

BEING SINGLE

I'm single, don't pity me. I'm not lonely. I chose to be single. Because honestly, I'm done. Done settling. Done dating shitty women. Because now I know. I know what I want and I know what I deserve. Mostly I don't mind being single and having no friends. But than again there are days where I would like having someone to talk to and someone to cuddle with. I will embrace being single. So what if I'm alone right now. I'm going to embrace it. I'm going to go get coffee alone. Watch movies alone. Get to know myself. Nothing bad can come from riding whatever wave to self improvement I'm blessed with in the moment. 

Single? No I am just in a relationship with "FREEDOM". It takes a strong person to remain single in a world that is accustomed to settling with anything just to say they have something. I am perfectly fine with being single, I have my Cat Mischief and he loves me. I am single and I am building my empire, finding myself, healing myself, loving myself, being passionate, getting fit, growing friendships, meeting new people and making memories.

You know, they say being single for a long period of time is dangerous. Once you see how peaceful it is, you don't even want to deal with people. I haven't even been single that long and I'm already starting to see that and see how peaceful it really is. I decided to walk away from things that steal my peace of mind and my happiness and I am learning to love the sound of my feet walking away from things not meant for me. There is a purpose for everyone I meet. Some people come into my life to test me. Some to teach me. Some to use me, and some to bring out the very best in me. I don't fear being lonely, I fear being in a relationship where I feel alone. And I've been in a few relationships like that.

Being single is not just okay. But it's a blessing in disguise. I didn't realize that until recently when I changed my perspective on relationships. And it's great, I am glad I changed my outlook on being single. However, I've realized that being single isn't a time for me to look for love. I'm using this time to work on myself and grow as an individual. That means I'm taking my time deciding how I want my life to be and who I want to spend it with. I'm enjoying every minute of it, I am being selfish with my time, my money and my space. I can come and go as I please and stay out as late as I want too. Of course, we all know I go to bed early but hell, if I wanted to stay out late as fuck I could.

And honestly, being single is better than being lied to, cheated on, and disrespected. It's far better than being part of a broken relationship, which I've been in many of those. It's not a status, it is a word that shows that I am strong enough to enjoy my life without depending on others. Which has been my problem in a lot of relationship because I've learned you can't depend on anyone but yourself. The best thing about being single is no drama, no fighting, no crying, no worries, no confusion, no heartbreak.

Being single is better than being in a relationship with someone that fills my heart with doubt. And I've come to realize that I really can't trust anyone no matter who they are. Because I trusted them, and of course they let me down, just like all the rest did. I will trust less now, that has always been my biggest problem trusting too much.

Because I'm single now, I have time to learn about myself. I don't have to share my bed with anyone but Mischief and Oreo if he chooses to sleep in bed with me which he most of the time doesn't. I don't have to consider anyone else's plans which has been a problem in one relationship I had unfortunately. I can hang out with whoever I want, whenever I want without having to hear a bunch of bullshit. I can listen to whatever kind of music I want in my Jeep, which means I don't have to listen to shitty ass love music thankfully. I don't have to worry about impressing anyone but myself because the only person I have to love is myself. I don't have to make an effort. I don't have to worry about hurting because that's all I did in relationships I've had, was hurt. I don't have to worry about buying Valentine's Day bullshit, thank you Satan. Valentine's Day is so fucking overrated and a bullshit holiday created just to fucking make money. 

Being single means I have freedom!!! I have complete control of my life. I can focus on my career and my goals and put those first instead of having to worry about putting someone else first.  Yes I'm single and yes you can message me, and maybe I will reply, but if I know you're looking for a relationship or a fuck buddy than I probably won't respond. Being single is definitely better than being with the wrong person, which with my track record they were all the wrong people obviously.

You know, being single is not a status, it means that I am strong enough to live and enjoy life without depending on someone else for my happiness. I have to find happiness within myself and love myself before I can love someone else and make someone else happy anyway.  You know during this time since I've become single, I've realized just how great my alone time is. It's been a time to work on my writing, a time to reflect on my life. Being single used to mean that nobody wanted me. Now it means I am smart for taking my time deciding how I want my life to be and not settling for just anyone to spend it with. It doesn't mean that I know nothing about love. Sometimes, being solo is wiser than being in a fake relationship which obviously now that I look back, I've apparently been in a lot of those. 

I choose to be single so I can let go of the hurt and pain that stopped my life's flow. My solitude is my strength and not my sorrow. I thought being single would be boring as fuck but I was wrong. I've come to the realization that being in a relationship is too complicated. Talking to someone is too frustrating. Friends with benefits is too emotional. What the fuck is life?